Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize