I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
