I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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