she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
