I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
