My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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