Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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