i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"