3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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