What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize