the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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