I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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