Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Ketchup is God's man juice
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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