That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
