Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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