OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize