Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
