the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
