The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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