He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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