I just made out with a guy for $7.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
