Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
