Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
