belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Damn victory sex feels great
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
