he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize