Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Randomize