you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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