I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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