Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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