and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
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She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
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Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
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