Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
