i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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