Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
My cat gives me a boner
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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