I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
