I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
