you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
oh god was she eating orange peels again
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Come share oat with me in your robe
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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