and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
