with your own penis?
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize