weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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