My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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