I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
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its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
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You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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