i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
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