And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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