i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
