haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
