i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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