if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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