you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize