youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize