You're my little dorito
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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