The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
well you can't waste a boner
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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