So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
