Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
