he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
